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March 3, 2019 was the day I downloaded my Human Design chart after hearing about the modality on a podcast. I was spiritually curious at that time, I’d gone through a massive health healing journey a few years prior after experiencing debilitating burnout, being diagnosed with Hashimoto’s, IBS, gluten intolerance & leaky gut. I left shift work life, a relationship to someone I thought I’d be with forever & many identities and comforts crumbled away too. But still there was more...
Human Design opened me up to the possibility that the constant tug I felt inside that something wasn’t right was not to be brushed off. That there were many more layers to be shed as I travelled the path of self-discovery. I self-studied for about a year, running charts for others & reading books and online resources (though there weren’t many then).
In the spring of 2020, I had my first official reading at one of the lowest emotional parts of my life. It was a big wake up call that I needed (a Manifestor will do that for you…grateful for you Katie). I want to be honest that it didn’t get clearer, easier or more peaceful right away. In fact, it got worse before it got better for me. I had a new awareness that I think caused even more turmoil inside of me knowing that my physical reality did not match my desires.
August 2020 I took a trip to PEI to visit my partner who had moved to the island for his own healing journey and my heart never came home with me after that. I knew I needed to make changes in my life but the emotionality of my human experience was still very thick. There was a lot to release still. You can’t force this process. I signed up for Human Design School with such a deep knowing that this work would transform my life and the life of others.
Fall 2020 I, though reluctantly, took more time off of work to integrate & process. My mental health was suffering, my body began fighting back and the positive glimmer of hope I had in PEI was fading.
In December 2020 we decided it was time and we packed our things and moved to PEI. I let go of many more identities throughout 2021. I have never been more isolated. I healed, I processed, I regained my strength and opened myself up to a new way to serve others.
March of 2021 I started offering readings while I simultaneously continued my own Human Design experiment of de-conditioning & shedding layers of my not-self. I regained my connection to my passion of healing others and having a lasting impact in their lives, something that in my previous career I lost overtime. One year later I am extremely proud of my business, Steff Sullivan Collective. A place to move, discover & cultivate intuition and connection.
March is such a special month now. This day three years ago I unlocked something inside of me that changed everything. Forever grateful for those who have come along this journey (and those who parted during my process too) & those who offer their wisdom of this work. I’m completing my first Saturn return currently and while I by no means have life at all figured out, the clarity I have moving into my new phase of life is such a gift.
If you’re reading this and you’re in that sticky, lonely & heavy time I am sending my love. While it feels isolating, I want you to know that I myself have been there, and most people I know have too. It may be hard to sit in the discomfort but just know that going through whats there for you instead of around it is brave, powerful and transformative. Go easy on yourself. It’s said in Human Design that it can take approximately seven years to fully decondition and live your design to be your most authentic self. Don’t rush it. You can do this and I am here to support you if you need it.
Take good care,
Steff
3/5 Emotional Manifestor If this post resonates with you please feel free to leave a comment, share with a friend or your community.